“Boundaries” has become a sort of buzzword surrounding people and things that make us uncomfortable, but what actually are boundaries, and how do we set them? Why are boundaries important in work-life balance? Let’s chat!

Boundaries are limits you set for yourself for how people treat you. Not how people live their own lives, but how they treat you. Boundaries are about your relationship with yourself just as much as they are about your relationships with others. They apply to every relationship in your life- whether with friends, family members, partners, and especially co-workers and supervisors. Boundaries help honor your needs, goals, feelings, and values.

When deciding what boundaries to set, some self-reflection is required. Pay attention to what situations or actions make you uncomfortable and why, and consider if that is your brain and body giving you a sign that a boundary needs to be set. Ask yourself what you like to keep private from certain people and what things are “dealbreakers” for you.

Along with self-reflection, communication is required to effectively set boundaries. It’s important to remember that assertive communication is most productive, and that it’s different from aggressive communication. You’re not being rude by setting boundaries! You’re preserving your peace and helping strengthen your relationships by making them healthier. Prioritizing your safety and needs is not mean or rude, it’s necessary. Setting boundaries usually starts with “I” statements, talking about how you feel, and then stating what enforcing the boundary will look like. For example “I don’t work off the clock so I will get to your after-hours emails in the morning.” Or “I don’t give out my phone number so here is an email address you can easily reach me at.”

If you are afraid of how someone might react when you set a boundary, that is a red flag that that relationship may not be healthy. Respect is key in all types of relationships. Other concerns include pushing or ignoring boundaries, not having any boundaries or feeling unable to be independent, and unwillingness to change or adjust to new boundaries being set.

Overall, boundaries are crucial in all types of relationships and makes those relationships stronger. Assertive communication, self-reflection, and a focus on “I” statements help set you up for boundary setting success. Remember, being respectful looks like welcoming boundaries because you care about the other person’s feelings. Setting and keeping boundaries can be hard at first, but you’re worth it, Gator.